5 frustrations that creep up when you’re trying to make positive changes
Here we go again.
Just when you think you’re making big strides to be the person you want to be and get past, well, the past, out come those familiar little demons.
Right there, at the ready, extending their grimy little hand, enticing you to go back to what you know.
Tempting?
Yes, of course, it is. We all want to stay safe and doing things in a familiar way feels super cozy.
But playing it safe doesn’t allow a lot of room to stretch your growth muscles or make strides.
You may encounter frustrations as you make an effort to take back control of your life and choose to no longer be a product of your past. When they creep in, you’ll want to give up and stay in stuckness because the price to make a change seems a little high.
But don’t give up.
When you are committed to breaking out from old patterns or limiting beliefs and rewriting your story, it can open up an emotional Pandora’s box.
Understand these feelings are normal, don’t be ashamed
There may be things you feel ashamed of that can keep you in the universal stuckness you feel. But give yourself a little grace.
Repeating old patterns-This is normal because once again, your subconscious wants to keep you comfortable and pushes you toward familiar patterns. When you know what’s next, the predictable outcome feels safe. You’ll always be drawn to that safety, and takes intentional work to resist it. It will be a process, and you’ll come to recognize that you’re repeating the old pattern. You don’t need to be ashamed of that. You’re aware now.
There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered.
— Nelson Mandela
Falling off the wagon-Once you start setting new patterns and routines, you’ll undoubtedly be pulled back to what is familiar. Your subconscious wants that. Knowing that it’s part of the journey, reminds you that you actually have a choice. You may fall off occasionally, but choosing to get back to the new pattern is beneficial and empowering.
In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety.— Abraham Maslow
Acting out-Old patterns are close to you, right below the surface. It’s inevitable that it will be uncomfortable when they rear their head. Those old patterns are desperately trying to live on, even when you’re diligently trying to do things in a new and better way. You’ll have times when you act out, but it’s part of your journey to release the lifelong conditioning you’ve lived very comfortably with until now.
Strong emotions such as passion and bliss are indications that you’re connected to Spirit, or ‘inspired,’ if you will. When you’re inspired, you activate dormant forces, and the abundance you seek in any form comes streaming into your life. — Wayne Dyer
Charged emotional reactions-This is something you can expect when you’re dealing with overcoming old issues. You may feel as though you’re overreacting about someone cutting you off in traffic, but that response is a result of other past issues, so don’t be ashamed. It’s not you simply overreacting, but it’s a response to the meaning you’ve assigned to that emotion. In the case of being cut off in traffic, you may feel it’s an accurate example of the story of your life…being disrespected.
One aspect of soulful healing that is most challenging and therefore most fruitful is the need to release a part of your story that may be lying underneath. Healing requires a willingness to rewrite the story you tell yourself about what has happened in your life and
why it’s happened. There is often an emotional attachment to the pattern that doesn’t allow for easy change. — Robin Rose Bennett
Difficulty setting boundaries-When you change how you operate in life and begin to make yourself a priority, others may not recognize what you’re doing. They will have things to say. But you need the separation right now to make positive changes without the influence of old feelings, emotions, and patterns. Don’t feel bad about setting these boundaries. You need them.
Boundaries define us. They define what is me and what is not me. A boundary shows me where I end and someone else begins, leading me to a sense of ownership. Knowing what I am to own and take responsibility for gives me freedom. — Henry Cloud
When you set out to make some positive changes, ask questions as to why you feel the way you feel, and craft a new life for yourself that represents who you are now, you’re bound to bump up against some old stories or ideas that you’ve come to believe as fact about yourself.
It will take time, and you’ll fall off the horse now and again, but that’s just part of the journey.
You’ve had quite a long time to cement in those ideas about why things are the way they are, so change won’t always come easily.
Remember, you’re the architect of your life.
You have the power.
Make the decision to challenge the old hangups and beliefs.
Work through the roadblocks, be patient through the frustrations, and rewrite the story of you.